“routine is a ground to stand on, a wall to retreat to; we cannot draw on our boots without bracing ourselves against it.” ~Henry David Thoreau

Can someone please, tell me what happened to May?

For whatever reason, I thought that striving to be fully present in every moment would help me develop super vivid memories – or dreams, anyway. Thought I would be able to fill a book each day with stories full of meaning and mindfulness…

So how do I not remember much about May?

Last weekend we ventured out to ikea and I do remember that I felt very accomplished (and sore) after walking around for nearly two hours on those concrete floors, guiding one of those clever roll-any-which-way carts, resting only to enjoy swedish meatballs or test out some furniture.

During PT this week, I walked 520 feet in 6 minutes. Unassisted. Three weeks ago in PT I walked about the same. Except this week my strides felt longer, quicker. I took a few quick breaks to reset because it seemed like my muscles wanted to move faster than my brain was ready for. It didn’t make sense that I walked the same distance. Just as I started to get frustrated, I remembered that three weeks ago my strides were smoother, but at a slower pace. I didn’t rest or reset as often (if at all), so maybe there has been incremental improvement? I don’t remember how far I walked in 6 minutes back in November when I started PT… but it wasn’t even close to 520 feet.

what else about May? I remember some fantastic meals with some of my favorite people. One of my best friend’s birthday. My dad’s birthday and lovely mother’s day brunch with my grandmother. I remember shaving a few seconds off my time cycling. I remember feeling so much better about intermittent fasting. I remember volunteering to interview teachers at Adelaide’s school… and Adelaide’s dance recital.

Maybe I’m too settled into my comfortable routine – wake up, dry brushing then shower while pulling with coconut oil, get dressed, make breakfast for Adelaide then prepare and pack her lunch, enjoy a cup of bulletproof coffee, get Adelaide to school, ride 3 miles on the bike, 45-60 minutes to stretch/yoga, juggle one of five work projects, physical therapy on Thursday afternoon, lunch or dinner with a friend at least once a week, listening to good music, reading and researching, family dinners.

Maybe having a routine is a good thing. I can watch my numbers and notice (even small) improvements. Recognize the ‘why’ when things are off.

Of course, it will all change tomorrow.

School’s out for the summer!

be kind. stay cool. be well.